The Vehicle I Dislike the Most Right Now

I see this stupid car everywhere right now.  I don’t know how many people have purchased it, I don’t care to do the research.  I’m not interested in it’s probable good gas mileage or special features or anything like that.  I simply cannot stand the way it looks.

There are various things that I encounter that bother me for no particular reason.  I hate it when there are things that crunch inside other food that I have decided should not crunch (we won’t get into my quirks regarding food and food preparation, you don’t have the time to read it and I don’t have the energy to write it).  I am absolutely bothered by the stack of envelopes in the printer at work if someone has knocked them askew and I feel the need to straighten them every time I walk by.  When driving my car, I HAVE to have a clean windshield.  If there are streaks, they have to go.  I spend a fortune on washer fluid and if there’s even a tiny dent in the wiper blade that makes a streak…time for a new wiper blade.

I especially don’t like things that aren’t symmetrical.  Some things can get away with it…I had a cat that had a white triangle over one eye and that wasn’t so bad.  But certain things should never be allowed to happen.  The following photograph is an example of one of them:

I can’t stand the Nissan Cube.  The whole thing looks wrong the back windshield drives me crazy.  It just throws everything off.  What kind of window wraps around one side and has the other blocked off with metal?  What is that???  An abomination, that’s what.  Just looking at that picture is making me crazy.  It makes me feel squidgy and wrong.  I don’t know why I posted this other than I’m hoping people will read it and stop buying these things so I don’t have to be all discombobulated on the road when I’m driving.

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Cats Are Crafty Creatures

As you may have heard in previous posts, I have a young kitty by the name of Mr. Pip, Peep for short.  While he’s usually a very well behaved boy, I have been observing his activities lately and have discovered a pattern.  Peep is very loving with both myself and the boyfriend, but he is most certainly a Daddy’s boy.  He follows the boyfriend everywhere, curls up in his lap while he’s on the computer and is constantly bugging him for more attention.

The thing I’ve noticed lately is the fact that Peep has developed some very creative methods of attaining that desired attention, despite the fact that the boyfriend is usually trying to do something else.  In much the same manner a small child will be bad in order to get attention, Peep has started realizing that if he does something bad, he will get attention from his Daddy, whether negative or positive.

He has constantly been complaining to me that Peep behaves badly when I’m not around but I didn’t really believe it until the other night when I was sitting on the bed, surfing the net, blogging and just generally wasting time when I suddenly heard a great deal of yelling from the office (attached to the bedroom by a little walkway) and saw Peep go shooting past the door in a blur and the boyfriend not far after.  After Pip’s narrow escape and the boyfriend’s return, I questioned the preceding events.  Apparently, it’s our darling kitty’s nightly routine to slowly drive the boyfriend insane.  Usually while I’m already asleep and he’s trying to get some work done on the computer.

I inquired about what devious activities he could possibly get up to in order to drive the boyfriend into such a frenzied state.  The answer made me laugh hysterically.

He really owns his space

Every night, Peep goes through a system of carefully crafted irritations and traps in an effort to secure any attention he possibly can from his daddy.  The beginning of this nightly ritual starts always with the cat jumping up onto the computer desk to stand in front of the monitor, making his desire for attention known.  Sometimes, this will be the only thing he does for a while, simply choosing to lay down between the keyboard and the monitor, twitching his tail while he watches everything that goes on in the room.

At other times, this is just the beginning.  Any object within reach will be batted onto the floor.  Pens and coughdrops are definite targets, but anything light enough to be pushed around by a wee little kitty paw will suffice.  This is the point when Peep will be kindly set on the floor and sternly told to cut it out.  He will then chase all those little objects around the floor until he gets bored; and when Pip gets bored, it’s always a bad thing.  This is when the chair scratching and random pouncing starts.  He’s quite adept at climbing and will appear suddenly, as if from thin air, on the back of the chair, ready to poke and paw at the person seated in said chair.  This is the point where the boyfriend usually gets up and chases Peep away.

However, in the time it sometimes takes him to return, if he goes to get a glass of water or complain to me how bad our

A trap well set

kitty is, he will return to find a trap set upon the chair.   This trap comes in two forms; the obvious and the concealed.  If there was no cover on the chair, you can clearly see the kitty on the chair, his eyes huge and black, his tail twitching and what could be a little grin on his face, daring his humans to approach.

The second method of trap occurs if we have left a towel or blanket over the chair.  Upon returning to the room, an unsuspecting human will find an indiscreet lump under the towel, barely moving and biding it’s time until someone either touches that lump or even more unwittingly, sits down in the chair.  While the claws are not meant for terrible harm, they are meant to make a point.

And even now as I’m writing this post, sitting in the living room and watching a movie, I’m getting bombarded with instant messages about how bad Peep is being and the many naughty things he’s doing upstairs, trying to distract him from programming on his desktop.  The problem with the situation is not that Peep is being bad, it’s the fact that he knows he’ll get the reaction out of the boyfriend.  It’s why he never does the same time with me, because I won’t give him the reaction he wants and therefore reinforce his bad behaviour.  So in conclusion, as my MSN window lights up once more with a message from the boyfriend, begging for assistance, I will ignore it, hoping for the zillionth time that he will learn his lesson.